Raising children is no easy task. While some parents have to deal with babies that cry through the night, others have to struggle with children who throw regular tantrums. But the Browsers have a very different challenge to face while raising their children.
From the outset, the Browsers look like any other family. And in many accounts, they are very normal. However, they have a secret that sets them apart and they are about to share it with the world.
Meet The Browsers As They Appear To The Public
Looking at a photograph of the Browsers, they appear to be a typical American family. The mother of the household is Bianca Browser, a 32-year-old brunette woman. Her husband, and the father of the children, is Nick, a 27-year-old man.
The loving couple are the devoted parents to the lively toddlers Kai (aged 3) and Pax (aged 17 months). One step into their bustling household gives no indication that their life may be different from how it appears
Growing Up, The Browsers Could Never Have Anticipated The Life That They Have
By all public accounts, the Browsers appear to have the perfect home. Mom and dad love each other endlessly and the children are growing up with all that they could possibly want. However, when Bianca and Nick were growing up, they could never have imagined the life that they have today - it’s a life of their wildest dreams.
Nick and Bianca agreed to share their story on ABC’s national television show 20/20. By doing so, their story becomes all the more fascinating.
Bianca Shares Her Story, And It’s Not What You’d Expect
Sitting in front of the camera for ABC’s 2020, Bianca's long black hair and feminine features fill the camera frame. Opening her mouth, sweet words roll out, telling an unbelievable story.
Although Bianca sits in front of the world as a beautiful woman, she was actually born as a boy. Over the years, Bianca took the necessary steps to transform her young male body into that of a woman. But she’s not the only transgender in her relationship.
Nick Shares The Truth About His Identity As Well
Bianca is not the only one of the Browser couple who identifies as the opposite sex to their birth. Sitting next to Bianca is Nick, with cropped hair and whispers of a moustache on his face. However, Nick did not always sport masculine features.
In fact, Nick was born a girl named Nicole. Over the years he’s taken his own journey to become a transgender male. This means that both Nick and Bianca are transgender, and accept each other fully.
One Person’s “Normal” Is Another Person’s Unusual
The Bowsers have come to represent a “growing mainstream understanding of trans lives” - both as a couple and as individuals. While many trans people do not identify as “man” or “woman” in the same way that Nick and Bianca do, they still represent a progressive family.
By choosing to raise a family as a trans-couple, the Bowsers are taking it one step further and representing a truly progressive family. Their children will be raised not to see their gender, but rather identify them as “mommy” and “daddy”. But the journey that the couple took to get here was not an easy one.
Mommy and Daddy With A Twist
Bianca and Nick are determined to raise their children to have a healthy respect for versatile sexual identities. Without making a fuss about their biological genders, the couple has chosen to be identified only as “mommy” and “daddy”.
However, regardless of their confident stance in identity, both Nick and Bianca have struggled to get to the point that they are. And strangely enough, they follow remarkably mirrored paths as they were born, raised, and discovered themselves in Georgia.
The Point When Bianca Realized That Something Wasn’t Right
Born in Georgia, Bianca was a five-year-old boy when she realized that she didn’t identify with the body that she was born into. When her mother went to work, she would sneak into her closet. She would get dressed in her clothes, and slip into her heeled shoes.
It was during these moments that Bianca felt most liberated. However, describing her experience growing up she says she’s “lost for words” and that “It is difficult to talk about… I just had a really hard time growing up.” Her husband, Nick’s story is not much different.
Nick Best Recognized Himself In Another Body
Also growing up in Georgia, Nick experienced many of the same identity struggles as Bianca. Born a girl, Nick always thought, “I want to be a boy”. He’d look at boys without their shirts on and think “that’s what I want to look like”.
When Nick was 17, he came out as a lesbian, hoping that it would solve his problems. Sadly, it didn’t solve any problems and only made his situation worse.
The Repercussions of Feeling Trapped
As you can imagine - or at least try to imagine - both Nick and Bianca had a tough time growing up. Both felt trapped in their bodies and struggled to figure out their identities. The cruelty of their peers didn’t make it any easier.
During their formative years, the Browsers had to endure extensive bullying, name-calling, and being picked on by others in their immediate vicinity. These harsh responses from society made their personal journeys even more challenging.
The Browsers Had The Most Shocking Insults Hurled At Them
Kids can be cruel. Sadly, some kids never grow out of these harmful habits of bullying and become cruel adults. While growing up, the Browsers were faced with the difficult reality of struggling with their identity while being called offensive names. This only made their journey to adulthood all the more traumatic.
Bianca describes how she had to bear the brunt of being called a “queer” and a “fag” just because she was effeminate and didn’t fit the mould of a teenage boy.
Nick Took Matters Into His Own Hands And Made A Drastic Move
Nick was struggling with the same negative response from his close community. Not even his family was supportive of his journey to adulthood. When Nick came out as a lesbian at the age of 17, he made another bold move - he decided to leave home.
Both Nick and Bianca experienced a lot of rejection while trying to figure out who they are as people. This had a huge impact on the people that they grew to be.
Their Struggle With Society Boils Down To One Simple Fact
All through these years of struggle, Nick and Bianca continued to dedicate their energy to discovering themselves. The mental and emotional stamina needed to endure the challenges that they encountered made them resilient in a way that only they themselves can understand.
At the end of the day, they can both agree on one fact - that no one will ever understand what it’s like to be a transgender - except those that are transgender. It’s this understanding that allowed them to take huge steps in personal discovery.
Each Had Their Own Way Of Coming To Terms With Their Identity
Despite these challenges, both Nick and Bianca stuck to their guns and eventually settled in their identity as transgender. For Bianca, this happened in her twenties when she started living her life as a woman.
She began applying make-up and wearing woman’s clothes. She describes how living in this way lifted a heavy weight off of her shoulders, and allowed her to find happiness. However while Bianca came to terms with her identity as a transgender, she had to come to terms with something else as well.
They Came To The Realization That Some Things Weren’t Going To Be A Part Of Their Future
Coming to terms with their transgender identity - and being confident in it - was a huge achievement for both Nick and Bianca. By being who they wanted to be, and identify the way that they see themselves, they became increasingly happy.
But by embracing their identity as transgender, they were knowingly reducing their chance of finding love. Both of the Bowers admit that they never expected to find a soul mate or a life mate. Instead, they were focusing on themselves.
By Focusing On Themselves, They Allowed Themselves To Do Something Very Important
Choosing to ignore the teasing and taunting of society, Nick and Bianca chose to continue their personal journey. Each had their focus fully set on themselves. They chose not to be preoccupied with the chance of love but rather further transform their bodies.
Nick and Bianca continued taking hormones to change their bodies into the gender that they identified with. In addition, both were considering expensive surgeries to completely transform their bodies into the genders that they so deeply believed they were meant to be.
On One Fateful Evening, Their Plans Completely Changed
The process of changing your gender is neither easy nor affordable. Bianca was born as a boy and was pumping a lot of money into taking hormones to change her features into that of a woman. She had come so far but still needed one big gender reassignment surgery to biologically seal the deal.
She had started to save up her money for the surgery and had already made her plans when she met Nick. On that night, her whole world changed.
Bianca Found Love When She Least Expected It
Before meeting Nick, Bianca was going about her life and minding her own business. She had already come to terms with the fact that she’d probably never find a soul mate and was channeling her energy into herself.
Bianca worked as a performer at a local club. She was getting ready for her act one fateful night when Nick walked. The strapping young lad caught her eye, and Bianca decided to take matters into her own hands.
Bianca Wasted No Time In Making Her Move
What started out as a normal day at the club ended up changing Bianca’s life forever. After seeing Nick, she couldn’t keep her eyes off of him. The transgender performer turned to her friend who was working as a bartender and asked if she knew who he was.
The bartender answered with a "yes". So Bianca said, “well, just let him know that I think he’s cute.” But that message wasn’t needed because she walked up to Nick and introduced herself.
It Was A Bold Move On Bianca’s Part, But It Paid Off
Luckily, Nick responded well to Bianca’s advances and the two began dating. It was as if the stars aligned, and the pair became inseparable. When asked about how quickly they fell in love, Nick confidently responds that it was almost instantaneous for him.
The pair dated for a year during which time they got to know each other better before they decided to take the next step in their relationship. And it was a big one.
Wedding Bells Rang And Welcomed In A New Season
Finding true love was never part of Nick and Bianca’s long term plan. However, they found the magical sensation of love with one another. Through their year of dating, they realized that they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together.
The couple tied the knot with a small ceremony in their hometown, Georgia. They said their “I do”s and committed to spending the rest of their lives together. This led to some very interesting questions from nosey people.
Living Their Life Together Introduced A Unique Challenge
In many ways, Nick and Bianca’s relationship is phenomenal. As they both identify as transgender, they are able to respect and understand one another’s journeys in a way that no one else can. However, the fact that they are both transgender also introduces a unique challenge - that of being physically intimate.
In order to get physically intimate with one another, Nick and Bianca have to revert back to the sexual identities that they were born with - but now reject.
Those Brave Enough Began To Ask Intimate Questions About Their Intimate Moments
The couple comment that people always want to know how the pair have sex. And Nick responds, “Well how do you have sex?” Nick and Bianca get intimate in the same way.
Although their intimate moments present an interesting mental challenge, the pair have learned to view each other as each identifies. Nick describes, “For me, in my head, that’s not what I see and that’s not how I feel”. Regardless of their genitalia, the pair connect in a way that is intimate for them.
The Couple Decided To Take The Next Step, And It Would Be A Challenging One
In their adulthood, Nick and Bianca had become confident individuals who embraced themselves (and each other) as transgender. They had married one another and learned to navigate mental and emotional barriers when getting intimate.
It wasn’t long before they started pondering what many other married couples do - the opportunity to grow their families and have kids. This decision in itself would introduce some very unique hurdles to overcome.
The Cost Of Gender Surgery Became The Second Priority To Something Else More Important
The more that the couple began to think about having children, the more excited they became about the prospect. Up until this point in their lives, they had been saving to have their reconstructive surgeries. But now, they had a different financial priority.
The couple began to reassess their finances and put money aside to raise a family. Their physical restructure took a backseat while the option of having children called shotgun.
Nick Prepared For Another Transformation And It Would Be The Biggest One Yet
The couple had finally come to a point in their lives where they were confident in themselves, their love life and their choices. However, choosing to have kids in a natural way would turn their progress on its head and introduce a new challenge.
Over the past seven years, Nick had been transforming himself into an adult male. Now that the couple wanted to conceive children naturally, Nick had to agree to another physical transformation - that of being a mother.
Nothing Could Have Prepared Nick For The Experience That Followed
Although both Nick and Bianca had been taking hormones, Bianca still had the reproductive organs of a male, and Nick had the biological set up to carry a child. This meant that Bianca would need to impregnate Nick, and he would need to carry their children.
Nick describes the total of 20 months of his life being pregnant as “absolutely horrible” and the “darkest time in his life”. While his brain was telling him that he was one person, his body was telling him something else.
The Pregnant Father Battled A Daily Struggle Between Mind and Body
Although Nick identifies as a man, he agreed to play the important role of carrying his children to birth. As his stomach grew and his hormones raged, Nick endured a daily struggle between his mind and his body.
Worried about what people would do (or say) when they saw a pregnant man, he was afraid to go outside. Nick shares, “It was extremely difficult for me. I do not regret the choice of carrying our children. At the same time, my brain and body were fighting. I looked in the mirror and it was a constant battle.”
The Birthing Process Was A Huge Reward
In total, Nick was pregnant with Kai and Pax for nearly 20 months. During this time, Nick struggled with a mental, emotional and physical battle. However, when the time was up, Nick delivered two healthy boys via caesarian section.
The transgender couple had achieved what many “normal” couples struggle to achieve. They had created two healthy, baby boys and expanded their family by two in a completely natural way. Now that their family had grown, they needed to make a few more changes.
The Family Of Four Made Another Big Decision
Nick and Bianca’s family had grown, and their priorities had now shifted to raising their family. They packed up their belongings and moved to a quiet neighborhood in Louiseville, Kentucky. However, their move to suburbia was not the only “normal” thing that the family did.
The Bowsers live like a completely normal family. On weekends, you’ll find them at the toy store, or visiting the aquarium. Their two young boys are completely normal, and view their parents the same way. At least, they do for now.
What Happens Next?
At the moment, the couple dedicates their days (and nights) to raising their two young boys. Both Kai and Pax are too young to really fathom the complexities of identity and love their parents as they are. Nick is “daddy” and Bianca is “mommy”, regardless of their physical make-up.
However, one can’t help but wonder what will happen when the lively toddlers grow older and start asking questions. Bianca shares, “It’s always something that I have looked forward to and this is nothing that I have been ashamed of. I have no dread whatsoever telling our children where we came from and how we lived our lives.”
This Confidence Doesn’t Stop The Parents From Preparing The Conversation
Although Nick and Bianca are confident in their identity and have no shame in where they come from, they are under no illusions that the conversation will be an interesting one. Nick mentions that he anticipates the day that the questions come and the school calls saying “Your child says that mommy has a penis.”
The couple is unsure of when and how the conversation will be had but they agree that they will gradually explain themselves in a way that the children can understand.
The Young Boys Will Hear The Usual Story Of Birth - But With A Twist
Every child loves to hear the story of how they were born. While some parents dive deep into the details about what happens when two people love one another, other parents choose to tell the light-hearted story of a stork dropping the baby.
Nick and Bianca are committed to telling Kai and Pax their story of birth, including the twist that they came out of daddy’s body.
A Promise To Tell The Truth, The Whole Truth, And Nothing But The Truth
Although they are not entirely certain about when they will explain their story to their children, the couple is certain that they will be telling their children the truth. Both Nick and Bianca believe that telling the truth is the most important part of the journey.
When the children start asking questions about pictures around the house, they will explain the truth by using simple explanations and easy words that the boys will understand. As time passes and the boys get older, their story will progress in complexity.
The Family Have Faith and Hope For The Future
The family’s future holds a lot of uncertainties, but neither Nick nor Bianca express any fear about what the future holds. They both have a lot of faith and hope that their children will understand their personal stories. By using simple explanations, they aspire to encourage respect and acceptance in their household and beyond.
Also, they hope that their neighbors and the boys’ school friends will see them as human beings - nothing more, and nothing less.
Society Is Constantly Shifting, And No One Knows What The Future Holds
The couple has high hopes that by the time that Kai is in third or fourth grade that society as a whole would have changed for the better.
Looking at how much society’s perception of identity and sexual orientation has changed from a decade ago, there’s no reason why it shouldn’t progress further in the next three to four years. Hopefully, by then, more people will be accepting of the couple’s story.
Who Knows Their Secret?
Before the couple sat down to do their interview on 20/20, they admit that very few people knew the truth about their identity. Only the people that the couple works with know that they are biologically still male and female.
However, the couple laughs when mentioning that this number of people will increase dramatically after the show goes live on national television. But what about the reaction of the public when the truth comes out?
The Couple Is Not Concerned About The Public's Reaction - Regardless Of What It May Be
The couple smile when they say that they are not concerned about the reaction of the public. They know that people will have opinions, and those opinions are not their concern. What they do hope, is that awareness will be raised.
They admit that the only reason that they haven’t completed their transformations is financial. Nick explains, “The United States is slightly different when it comes to surgery and insurance and things like that. Most of the time you have to pay a lot of money - and we both need surgery.”
Nick And Bianca Have A Special Message To Share With The World
Talking to ABC’s 20/20 host, the couple shares a message that is close to their hearts. They want people to know that although they may be biologically different, they are not really different from anyone else.
They still do the same things that everyone else does, and they are the same type of family as everyone else. With that being said, the family embraces the parts of their unique story and is proud of how far they have come.
The Couple Sets Their Sights On The Future
Bianca shares some closing words about the possibility of their complete transformation, saying, “Now that we have our children, their well-being, their lives, that’s what’s important. If it comes around to where I am able to, then that would be great, but it’s no longer about me. It’s about our family.”
Nick and Bianca’s stories are truly incredible. Their journey to selfhood and confidence in their identity is both noble and inspiring. The fact that they are trans-parents and were able to grow their family naturally, makes their story even more special.
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